Dear Sir/Madam,

I hereby hand in my resignation from the position of President of the Grumpies Emotion Association. This is mainly due to not wanting to fulfill and live up to the rigid requirements of said position.

The workload for maintaining the attitude and demeanor is both demoralizing and demeaning. Trying to carry myself in the constant state of Grumpy has proven to be more difficult now that I have found love.

This leads me to believe there is a dichotomy in emotional stances between the two positions – one being President and the other being husband and father.

With time to grow into the aforementioned role of husband, I find it to be a much more preferred state of being.

So, find enclosed:

  • My membership card that I have held since 1982
  • my official keyring, battered and scratched from shoving up people’s noses
  • my notice of office. Please excuse the crossed out section. My wife and I prefer to see lover instead of president
  • last but not least, find specially wrapped the chip from my shoulder. It just does not suit me anymore.

Yours sincerely,